Holy smokes! There’s mountains in ‘dem hills.

Blogged in General by Eisenstein Sunday September 30, 2007 at about 11:25 AM

I’ve heard of ski slopes in the desert. It would be a strange experience for those who live in Dubai and wherever else they have them to go skiing in a place they grew up with no extreme sports. But I’m sure there is a cheesiness to skiing in artificial slopes. There is probably a theme park feel to it–extravagant and artificial. Imagine going to a state park in Florida and taking your bike on the trails boasted in the brochure and getting your ass kicked by some serious mountain biking.

Alafia park is about 40 minutes from me. A long time ago they did phosphate mining and made the most locally-extreme terrain you will ever see in a globally-flat location. Now nature has reclaimed everything but the shape of the ground and the trails the park maintains. Trees and bits of lakes and rivers stream past as your soul shrinks away, eclipsed by the singular experience of engaging headlong a 15 foot drop, too steep to climb back up on foot (unless you go off the trail and use trees).

After falling twice, I jumped back on my bicycle without hesitation. Coming to a descent that was not any steeper than the others but had a much more difficult turn to negotiate, I couldn’t talk myself out of it.

Split, jagged, and earthbound, the initial rush consumes me again. But I’m losing the trail. I unwrench one of my cramped claws and squeeze the brake. Too late, I’m on my own glutinous path, too steep for hope. Squeeze both brakes and get it over with. Over the handlebars you go. Meet the ground politely with a somersault. Watch out for your bike! See it fly over your head and crash into some saplings. The adrenaline brings me to my feet looking for flat ground to test my legs. The blood tricks down in a few new places and I feel a little bruised, but nothing broken. As far as losing the trail and eating shit into the bushes goes, I do it gracefully.

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Blogged in Computers, General by Naproxen Saturday September 29, 2007 at about 3:02 PM

Slackers

Blogged in EvilCON by Naproxen Saturday September 29, 2007 at about 11:40 AM

Life Expectancy Calculator

Blogged in General by Naproxen Wednesday September 26, 2007 at about 11:27 PM

Marconi’s Great Grandchild: Ultra-Wideband Wireless USB

Blogged in Computers, Nerdiness by Naproxen Wednesday September 26, 2007 at about 12:59 AM

Get Over Ourselves; Don’t Depart Iraq in a Hurry

Blogged in Politics by Naproxen Wednesday September 26, 2007 at about 12:39 AM

Civic Liberty Quiz

Blogged in Nerdiness, Politics by Naproxen Sunday September 23, 2007 at about 12:41 AM

Irony of Life

Blogged in General by Naproxen Sunday September 16, 2007 at about 11:02 AM

Top 10 Most Polluted Places on Earth

Blogged in General by Naproxen Friday September 14, 2007 at about 9:35 AM

Your Favorite Programming Language and Your World View

Blogged in Computers, Humor, Nerdiness by Naproxen Friday September 14, 2007 at about 1:55 AM

This is What Our Soldiers Died For?

Blogged in Politics by Naproxen Saturday September 8, 2007 at about 1:45 AM

Thoughts on the structure of mating calls

Blogged in General by Eisenstein Friday September 7, 2007 at about 5:23 PM

Moray Eels Have Set of Double Alien-Like Jaws

Blogged in Nerdiness by Naproxen Thursday September 6, 2007 at about 8:53 AM

Lamest Comic Book Ever: Alphabet Supes

Blogged in General by Naproxen Monday September 3, 2007 at about 1:28 PM

Soul Calibur Breasts Size Getting Ridiculous

Blogged in Gaming, Humor, NSFW by Naproxen Sunday September 2, 2007 at about 1:07 AM

An Ode to Being Young and Male

Blogged in Humor, NSFW by Naproxen Saturday September 1, 2007 at about 6:22 PM

Flight Simulator Found in Google Earth

Blogged in Computers, Gaming by Naproxen Saturday September 1, 2007 at about 5:12 PM
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